Horoscopes for March 8, 2018


by Michelle Olmsted

Aries (Mar 21–Apr 19) You are entering a period of reflection and self-discovery. Lately, you’ve been seeking answers to life’s big questions. The question you’re asking yourself TODAY is: How did I get here?

Taurus (Apr 20–May 20) His name was Peter, and he was the first person to ask you to be his girlfriend. You were in seventh grade. He was your first kiss, your first everything. You thought he would be your forever. But when you thought about forever, you didn’t think past high school graduation, past the confines of your small town. When he broke up with you the week before you both left for college, you thought your life was over. Who were you if you weren’t Peter’s girlfriend?

Gemini (May 21–Jun 20) He handed you a beer at a party one night. His name was Dave and you were in Comp 101 together. You thought he was okay looking when you first saw him in class, but when you saw him at the party and he offered you some attention, you thought he was handsome and charming. A couple hours later, you were in his dorm room under his twin sheets. You hadn’t had sex with anyone besides Peter, and you liked how it felt to be with someone new. You slept with each other, now and then, for the next four years. He never took you on a date. You weren’t sure you wanted him to.

Cancer (Jun 21–Jul 22) You told your best friend Charlie about your fuck buddy Dave. You wanted to make him jealous, but he didn’t take the bait. Yes, he said, Dave was an idiot, but he encouraged you to experiment. “It’s college!” he’d said. You didn’t know that he was telling himself to experiment, too. With his roommate. His words echoed in your head as you took on more risks. You were cosmically drawn to a Leo.

Leo (Jul 23–Aug 22) You don’t remember his name. It was the summer after your Junior year, and you were at a bar with some friends from high school. After a few rounds, he took your hand and led you to the restroom in the back. You remember the bumper stickers that covered the walls. The crack in the ceiling. The harsh fluorescent light. You had him walk out first so you could pee and splash water on your face. He was gone by the time you walked out.

Virgo (Aug 23–Sep 22) His name was Phillip. He was your first grown-up relationship. When he said, “We need to talk about something,” you thought he was going to ask you to move in with him. Instead, he said he wanted to join the army. You romanticized the long-distance relationship, the reunion after his deployment. He didn’t come home.

Libra (Sep 23–Oct 22) His profile name was Handsome28. Ugh. You should have known better, but you were grieving and longed for companionship. You blocked him the next day.

Scorpio (Oct 23–Nov 21) He criticized how you looked and what you wore. He yelled at you when you didn’t answer his call. But his sad eyes. His dimpled smile. You kept taking him back. Until he…well, you know, but you’re not allowed to talk about that, legally speaking.

Sagittarius (Nov 22–Dec 21) Sam messaged you on Facebook. You had graduated high school together and he was back in town. Do you want to meet up for a drink? he asked. Sure, you replied. Smile emoji.

Capricorn (Dec 22–Jan 19) Nate told you he wasn’t ready to be a father. He gave you $178 for his half of the doctor’s bill.

Aquarius (Jan 20–Feb 18) His name is John. A mutual friend introduced you at a dinner party. You talked for hours that night and, for the first time, you didn’t pretend to be someone different, someone you thought he wanted you to be. Eight months later, he asked you to marry him. You eloped to Mexico the next day.

Pisces (Feb 19–Mar 20) She was born on February 28. She has your eyes and his smile. She made you a mother. She wakes in the night, looking for you, and you rock her in the crook of your arm bleary-eyed and deliriously in love. When she falls back asleep, sometimes you stand there for a while just to watch her breathe.

About the Author:

Michelle Olmsted is a freelance writer and editor. She lives just outside of Austin, Texas, with her husband and daughter.